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Number 10. Huw Edwards

He’s a newsreader and he’s from Bridgend.  I go to Bridgend sometimes with my mum because there’s a big factory-outlet shopping village there.  To be honest, I probably wouldn’t have included Huw anywhere in my top ten if my mum hadn’t begged me to.  She massively fancies him.  Mwuhahahuwspew.

Number 9.  My Mum

My mum is very important to me and it would be wrong not to include her in this list.  So I’ve decided to position her at number 9 so that she can cosy up next to Huw.  My mum is personally responsible for reducing the crime in Cardiff by about 95%.

Number 8. Siân Lloyd
     

Siân is a weather-girl and she has been for about fifty years.  I find her truly very inspiring because she always seems very fresh and enthusiastic about her job and never seems to get at all bored of telling us that it’s raining outside.  Just like Huw Edwards, she is from Bridgend too – which is weird really because it’s only a little place.

Number 7. Elvis Presley

I’m not talking about the real one.  I’m talking about the fat looky-likey who sleeps on a bench in Whitchurch Village – which is where I live.  A lot of people wouldn’t think to put Elvis on a favourite person list.  But that’s because they’re overlooking his positive points.  One of these is his voice.  He can sing exactly like the real American Elvis – except with a strong Welsh accent.  Also, Elvis knows a lot about philosophy.  If it wasn’t for him, I would never have discovered the amazing life-changing ideas of people like René Descartes and Socrates.  If you have no idea what I’m on about, it’s probably because you aren’t an Existentialist Absurdist like I am. 

Number 6. Alex Jones

Alex Jones is the presenter of The One Show.  I don’t really like The One Show but it’s on when I’m eating my tea so I usually end up seeing it anyway.  The best bit of the programme is when a bald man comes on to talk about wildlife.  This part of the show has nothing to do with Alex Jones though.  The reason I like her is because she has really nice hair.  I’m pretty certain that she uses Melody Burnt Conker.  Alex is from a place called Ammanford.  I’ve never been there.  I looked it up on Wikipedia though.  To be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever bother actually going.   

Number 5. Tom Jones

Tom Jones is one of the most famous people in Wales.  As well as being Alex Jones’s dad, Tom is an absolutely legendary singer.  And even though he’s a senior citizen, he is still a pin-up!  Women from all over the world regularly throw their knickers at him.  Personally, I think this is actually quite disgusting and if I were Tom I would insist that they make sure they are freshly washed

Number 4. DSB

DSB’s full name is Dame Shirley Bassey.  She’s from Tiger Bay which is an area of Cardiff which doesn’t really exist anymore.  This is a shame I reckon because Tiger Bay is a great name for a place and sounds really exciting.  DSB is quite possibly the most famous person to ever come from Wales ever!  If we were allowed to pick our own Welsh queen, she’d be it.  I love her.  Everyone does.  To be honest, it would be really rude and disrespectful not to.

Number 3. Goose

Like me and my mum and DSB, Goose is a proper Cardiff girl.  Her real name is Gail McKenzie but nobody actually ever calls her this.  She is my best friend in the whole world.  She is also extremely clever.  (Although she only got an A for her GCSE English coursework and I got an A*.  Just saying.)

Number 2. Gareth David Lloyd George Stingecombe

What can I say?  He’s lush.  I love him.  I would have put him at number 1 but I thought that would be a bit predictable.  Also, I think it’s important to keep him on his toes.

Number 1. Rhys Wetherspoons

She is massively pretty and talented and globally famous and definitely the most famous actress to ever come out of Wales.  Go Girl! 

I have no idea why she’s got a bloke’s name though.